It is 8:35AM and this is Radames writing. Yes, after all of the stuff and obstacles that Wynne wrote about me not going to ET in her previous post, I am next to my wife and sitting in the United lounge having coffee as I write this. We had a restless night of sleep because we did not know what to expect this morning. Was I going to get through? If I did, would I get on the plane? Question after question popped in to our heads as we tried to figure out what we were going to do while driving up to Dulles from TN. Due to Wynne not getting any sleep, she got up in the middle of the night and e-mailed our travel agents who had not reached out to us after us trying to get in contact with them all of Saturday. After Wynne's e-mail, she called at around 4:30AM. Wynne told her the situation and she immediately had me ready to jump on another flight from JFK tomorrow night due to the fact that I was going to be there trying to get my passport renewed in one day. We got up at 6AM and we felt pretty good about what was going to happen. Either we were going together or we were going seperately. We were ready for anything.
Our agency director then called and informed Wynne that she had spoken to our in country rep and he told her that he had never heard of such a thing as a 6 month rule regarding passports and visas. He then placed a call to his friend, who by the way is the head of visa officers in the airport, and he told him that as long as a passport is valid, I would be good to go. Great way to start off our trip.
We arrived at the Ethiopian Air counter at about 7:30AM. We calmly hauled our luggage to the first class lane and up to the checkout agent. Wynne smiled and told her how excited we were going to Africa, that this was our first time going, and we were going to pick up our son. The agent calmly looked at our tickets, passports, and other documents. Our luggage was placed on the scale, weighed, and put on the belt. Our tags were being printed and other things were being put in order as Wynne and myself looked at each other waiting for the other shoe to drop as it has happend with everything else in this process. My stomach was in knots as if I was lying to th cops about some illegal activity and Wynne was sweating as though she was being interrogated by Ethiopian authorities. The agent is finishing everything up and she picks up our passports one last time. She looks at mine, turns to me and says, " Have you had your passport renewed?" My stomach drops. The gig is up. I can only imagine what Wynne is going through as she heard this. I say excuse me to her and then she laughs and says,"Oh, it expires in November. I didn't see the year. You're ok." A wave of calmness goes over me as Wynne shows the agent a picture of Addison and she remarks how cute he is. She gives us our stuff and we walk away feeling as though we are walking on cloud nine. Wynne and I look at each other with huge smiles, go through security with a huge relief and realize that we are about to embark on the journey to finally bring home our son.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Saturday, August 29, 2009
The Saga Continues
We are supposed to leave at 10:15 in the morning, and here it is midnight the night before, and we don't know if we are going to be able to get on the plane. We are still two hours away from DC (we fly out of Dulles), we need to be at the airport at 7am, and we have no idea what tomorrow morning's check-in will entail.
To make a long story short, Radames' passport expires in 3 months and he had NO idea this would be an issue. When we were finally packing up our whole live (in one day!) and getting all of our paperwork completed, copied, organized, etc., I saw his passport and thought, "oh, i feel like i've heard before that passports have to be valid for more than 6 months post-travel to get in some countries." Fast forward to him flipping out, us scavenging on-line for hours, calling and emailing everyone and anyone in this process who is supposed to be helping us (although they aren't!)....and we ended the night with Radames hysterically crying, screaming, rocking himself and beyond consoling. It was indeed true. On the ethiopian embassy site it says the passport has to be valid for 6 extra months beyond travel. No one at our agency or travel agency ever told us this!!!
We spent the night flipping out, me watching Radames cry himself to sleep while i pretended to be okay and saying, "it'll be fine, honey, we'll get there...we're gonna make it...it'll all work out." And then once he fell asleep I lost it. I called and got him an extension appointment in Philly for first thing Tues am, b/c that's the earliest one I could find on the eastern seaboard. I checked every possible flight that could still get him to Addis by Thursday's exit appointment, and there were none on our airline and there definitely none that would get him there if doesn't get a renewed passport until Tuesday afternoon. I just laid there and stewed on whether I should go without him, how we could change our flights, when we could get a passport renewal appt, how we could find a notary in the middle of the night that would notarize official paperwork that allows only one parent to pick up the child (which we can't do b/c those docs have to state authenticated after notarizing, and there's no way we could get them notarize, to nashville and then back to DC by Sunday at 7am!), the horrors of being there without him, him being here without me, us being without Ella for even longer, us missing our embassy appointment, etc. I finally crawled into Ella's bed hoping that the peace of her little snore would lull me to sleep. I think it finally did at around 6am.
At 10:30 we woke up and realized it wasn't a bad dream. We immediately started making calls to the ethiopian airlines ticket counter, scrambling for other flight options, calling the owners of the hotel we're at (asking if it was true and what we should do), frantically trying to get ahold of our travel agent to no avail, trying to get ahold of our adoption agency to no avail, etc. Thank the lord for Meredith who called a passport expediting service in NYC that said if RR would be in NYC at 7:30am with passport, license, new itenerary proving he was leaving within 24 hours, $350 in cash and a $135 check for the passport, they'd give him an extended passport by 5pm on Monday!
So...that's the plan as of now. If they don't let him on the plane (and perhaps even if they will, b/c the issue really isn't with the airlines, it's with the entry/visa process in Ethiopia when we get off the plane where they could say "welcome, now get the hell back on the plane b/c you can't stay"), then he's gonna get a different travel agent to find him a flight that'll leave on Mon night or Tues am from NYC, then take a train from DC to NYC (4 suitcases in tow), sleep in Brooklyn, be in NYC for the 7:30 "appointment", get a new passport, fly out of NYC through Dubai, hang out there for half a day, and then join me in Addis on Wednesday in time for our Thursday exit/embassy/finalize it all appointment!
If this all works out, then it could be fine. There are 100 opportunities for this to not go as planned, but we have to cling onto this for now. All we've got right now are our hopes, a pretty solid plan B, and each other.
Honestly, this is the one of the worst things we've had to deal with. We are furious, sad, confused, exhausted, scared, and did i mention exhausted. It's hard to believe that we should be singing camp songs and lullabies out loud while we make fun in-car video, and we're at a rinky dink gas stop righ now on our way to DC (bc we didn't leave home until 7pm, because we spent 6 hours on the phone today!) and we have no idea what the next week will hold. Ella is in great hands with Ganna and Sara Beth, the biz is in great hands, but this might be one of the most trying things we've ever been through.
We've cried together in the car so much on this trip. Radames was crying before we even left our neighborhood. I think we were doing such a good job holding it all together in front of Ella today that the minute we got in the car to drive away, it all just came pouring out. We've vascilated back and forth between, "it'll be fine" to "what did we do to deserve this?" to "should i just stay with you and we go through dubai together and both hope for Wed arrival?" to "is this really the way we are spending our 8th anniversary (on the 1st) - on opposite sides of the planet rather than hugging our new child together?", and just sniffling and blowing our noses on our shirts, b/c we have no friggin' napkins in the car although we have 8 suitcases full of everything that 3 human beings and dozens of orphans we've brought donations for could ever need!
Honestly, I just DON'T want to go by myself! That's where the tears keep coming from. I DON'T want to be without my rock! I don't want to meet Addison for the first time without him. This was never the pot of gold that was supposed to be at the end of the rainbow. I'm scared. Of being alone. Of being in Ethiopia by myself with four suitcases, a baby who doesn't know me that I'm supposed to be the new mother of, a husband who is missing somewhere in the middle east, no reliable mean of communication, and not to even mention how I tend to get nervous/panicky when I'm in situations where i feel trapped and out of control. I couldn't be any more petrified. I had to say to myself as I fell asleep last night, "Wynne, you CAN do this. You CAN do this alone for a few days! You HAVE to do this. This is not about you. This is about Addison. He needs you. He's waited long enough for you. You can do anything you set your mind to. Put your big girl pants on. Stick your fear in your pocket. Buck up and do what has to get done to get your baby home." I'm still telling myself those things as the tears well up in my eyes and I fantisize about this being a bad dream.
I don't know if we'll be able to post again, b/c RR is going to take my wireless card with him to NYC and he's going to be frantically getting his shit together so that he can leave, but we'll try to keep you posted as much as possible. As of now, it should be fine. I'll get there, he'll get a new passport, then he'll get there, then we'll do our embassy appt we've waited 6 months for, and we'll fly home on Friday night as planned. A week from now, we could be in our bed at home. Or... well, let's not continue to go there.
Thanks everyone who's been there for us! Thank you for your calls and prayers and emails and wishes. We want so badly to be passing along great info so that following our crazy journey isn't the biggest buzzkill ever, but, honestly, nothing about this process has been easy. When will this actually EVER get to be about our adorable new son who will have his arms wrapped around our necks!? When will we ever get to celebrate!? Pray for us that it'll be only 1 more day for me and 2-3 days for Radames :(
To make a long story short, Radames' passport expires in 3 months and he had NO idea this would be an issue. When we were finally packing up our whole live (in one day!) and getting all of our paperwork completed, copied, organized, etc., I saw his passport and thought, "oh, i feel like i've heard before that passports have to be valid for more than 6 months post-travel to get in some countries." Fast forward to him flipping out, us scavenging on-line for hours, calling and emailing everyone and anyone in this process who is supposed to be helping us (although they aren't!)....and we ended the night with Radames hysterically crying, screaming, rocking himself and beyond consoling. It was indeed true. On the ethiopian embassy site it says the passport has to be valid for 6 extra months beyond travel. No one at our agency or travel agency ever told us this!!!
We spent the night flipping out, me watching Radames cry himself to sleep while i pretended to be okay and saying, "it'll be fine, honey, we'll get there...we're gonna make it...it'll all work out." And then once he fell asleep I lost it. I called and got him an extension appointment in Philly for first thing Tues am, b/c that's the earliest one I could find on the eastern seaboard. I checked every possible flight that could still get him to Addis by Thursday's exit appointment, and there were none on our airline and there definitely none that would get him there if doesn't get a renewed passport until Tuesday afternoon. I just laid there and stewed on whether I should go without him, how we could change our flights, when we could get a passport renewal appt, how we could find a notary in the middle of the night that would notarize official paperwork that allows only one parent to pick up the child (which we can't do b/c those docs have to state authenticated after notarizing, and there's no way we could get them notarize, to nashville and then back to DC by Sunday at 7am!), the horrors of being there without him, him being here without me, us being without Ella for even longer, us missing our embassy appointment, etc. I finally crawled into Ella's bed hoping that the peace of her little snore would lull me to sleep. I think it finally did at around 6am.
At 10:30 we woke up and realized it wasn't a bad dream. We immediately started making calls to the ethiopian airlines ticket counter, scrambling for other flight options, calling the owners of the hotel we're at (asking if it was true and what we should do), frantically trying to get ahold of our travel agent to no avail, trying to get ahold of our adoption agency to no avail, etc. Thank the lord for Meredith who called a passport expediting service in NYC that said if RR would be in NYC at 7:30am with passport, license, new itenerary proving he was leaving within 24 hours, $350 in cash and a $135 check for the passport, they'd give him an extended passport by 5pm on Monday!
So...that's the plan as of now. If they don't let him on the plane (and perhaps even if they will, b/c the issue really isn't with the airlines, it's with the entry/visa process in Ethiopia when we get off the plane where they could say "welcome, now get the hell back on the plane b/c you can't stay"), then he's gonna get a different travel agent to find him a flight that'll leave on Mon night or Tues am from NYC, then take a train from DC to NYC (4 suitcases in tow), sleep in Brooklyn, be in NYC for the 7:30 "appointment", get a new passport, fly out of NYC through Dubai, hang out there for half a day, and then join me in Addis on Wednesday in time for our Thursday exit/embassy/finalize it all appointment!
If this all works out, then it could be fine. There are 100 opportunities for this to not go as planned, but we have to cling onto this for now. All we've got right now are our hopes, a pretty solid plan B, and each other.
Honestly, this is the one of the worst things we've had to deal with. We are furious, sad, confused, exhausted, scared, and did i mention exhausted. It's hard to believe that we should be singing camp songs and lullabies out loud while we make fun in-car video, and we're at a rinky dink gas stop righ now on our way to DC (bc we didn't leave home until 7pm, because we spent 6 hours on the phone today!) and we have no idea what the next week will hold. Ella is in great hands with Ganna and Sara Beth, the biz is in great hands, but this might be one of the most trying things we've ever been through.
We've cried together in the car so much on this trip. Radames was crying before we even left our neighborhood. I think we were doing such a good job holding it all together in front of Ella today that the minute we got in the car to drive away, it all just came pouring out. We've vascilated back and forth between, "it'll be fine" to "what did we do to deserve this?" to "should i just stay with you and we go through dubai together and both hope for Wed arrival?" to "is this really the way we are spending our 8th anniversary (on the 1st) - on opposite sides of the planet rather than hugging our new child together?", and just sniffling and blowing our noses on our shirts, b/c we have no friggin' napkins in the car although we have 8 suitcases full of everything that 3 human beings and dozens of orphans we've brought donations for could ever need!
Honestly, I just DON'T want to go by myself! That's where the tears keep coming from. I DON'T want to be without my rock! I don't want to meet Addison for the first time without him. This was never the pot of gold that was supposed to be at the end of the rainbow. I'm scared. Of being alone. Of being in Ethiopia by myself with four suitcases, a baby who doesn't know me that I'm supposed to be the new mother of, a husband who is missing somewhere in the middle east, no reliable mean of communication, and not to even mention how I tend to get nervous/panicky when I'm in situations where i feel trapped and out of control. I couldn't be any more petrified. I had to say to myself as I fell asleep last night, "Wynne, you CAN do this. You CAN do this alone for a few days! You HAVE to do this. This is not about you. This is about Addison. He needs you. He's waited long enough for you. You can do anything you set your mind to. Put your big girl pants on. Stick your fear in your pocket. Buck up and do what has to get done to get your baby home." I'm still telling myself those things as the tears well up in my eyes and I fantisize about this being a bad dream.
I don't know if we'll be able to post again, b/c RR is going to take my wireless card with him to NYC and he's going to be frantically getting his shit together so that he can leave, but we'll try to keep you posted as much as possible. As of now, it should be fine. I'll get there, he'll get a new passport, then he'll get there, then we'll do our embassy appt we've waited 6 months for, and we'll fly home on Friday night as planned. A week from now, we could be in our bed at home. Or... well, let's not continue to go there.
Thanks everyone who's been there for us! Thank you for your calls and prayers and emails and wishes. We want so badly to be passing along great info so that following our crazy journey isn't the biggest buzzkill ever, but, honestly, nothing about this process has been easy. When will this actually EVER get to be about our adorable new son who will have his arms wrapped around our necks!? When will we ever get to celebrate!? Pray for us that it'll be only 1 more day for me and 2-3 days for Radames :(
Thursday, August 27, 2009
IS THIS REAL!??
Do we really leave in 3 days!? Will we really be spending our anniversary in Africa? (8 years!) Will we really be "picking up" our new son!? This is so surreal. There really are no words.
But, of course, because I can always find words...we leave on Sat to drive to DC. We fly out of DC on Sun am directly to Addis Ababa. By Monday morning we'll be there and will get to "have" Addison that day! We'll be staying at the Ethiopia Guest Home (ethiopiaguesthome.com) which we are really excited about. It was built by two adoptive parents from California, so it's like a beach house in the middle of a city that sits atop a mountain. :) We are supposed to fly back on Friday night and arrive on Sat. We'll then drive home to start our new lives.
Sara Beth is coming to town to stay with Ella and take care of Brownie, and Smarty Pants work is all done! The details are getting wrapped up, the excitement is building and we just have no idea what to expect. It really is surreal!
We haven't even begun to pack bc we've been so busy with work and travel, but today's the big day for that. And, uh, maybe we should buy a bottle of something! Yikes. We're headed off to the dr today to get some altitude sickness medicine and various 'scrips for Addison, just in case. Tomorrow, we're going to see the nicest therapist lady in town who reminds me to breath and focus on what's important. Goodness knows I'm gonna need her to give me some perspective as we embark upon the biggest trip of our lives. Radames keeps reminding me that I have to just go with the flow and do as the Ethiopians do...e.g. expect the unexpected, not have a plan, be prepared for frustration, not think I'll be able to control anything, etc. Ah, that'll be easy. wink.
More to come
But, of course, because I can always find words...we leave on Sat to drive to DC. We fly out of DC on Sun am directly to Addis Ababa. By Monday morning we'll be there and will get to "have" Addison that day! We'll be staying at the Ethiopia Guest Home (ethiopiaguesthome.com) which we are really excited about. It was built by two adoptive parents from California, so it's like a beach house in the middle of a city that sits atop a mountain. :) We are supposed to fly back on Friday night and arrive on Sat. We'll then drive home to start our new lives.
Sara Beth is coming to town to stay with Ella and take care of Brownie, and Smarty Pants work is all done! The details are getting wrapped up, the excitement is building and we just have no idea what to expect. It really is surreal!
We haven't even begun to pack bc we've been so busy with work and travel, but today's the big day for that. And, uh, maybe we should buy a bottle of something! Yikes. We're headed off to the dr today to get some altitude sickness medicine and various 'scrips for Addison, just in case. Tomorrow, we're going to see the nicest therapist lady in town who reminds me to breath and focus on what's important. Goodness knows I'm gonna need her to give me some perspective as we embark upon the biggest trip of our lives. Radames keeps reminding me that I have to just go with the flow and do as the Ethiopians do...e.g. expect the unexpected, not have a plan, be prepared for frustration, not think I'll be able to control anything, etc. Ah, that'll be easy. wink.
More to come
Sunday, August 16, 2009
ONLY TWO MORE WEEKS!
Yikes! Are we really leaving in two weeks!? Could it really be true!? Addison is 10 months old now, so it's way overdue...but, wow, is it really here finally??
We finally bought him a few shirts today, so that's a start. But we are no more ready than the man on the moon. Work is as busy as ever, if not busier, so we just haven't been in baby mode at all. And I still have a trip to ATL, NYC and Chicago before we head out to DC on the eve of the 29th. That's not nerve racking at all. [insert excited sarcasm]
Anyhoo....we're trying to keep folks updated by email, too, so if you didn't just get an email from me, let me know and I'll add you to the list.
We finally bought him a few shirts today, so that's a start. But we are no more ready than the man on the moon. Work is as busy as ever, if not busier, so we just haven't been in baby mode at all. And I still have a trip to ATL, NYC and Chicago before we head out to DC on the eve of the 29th. That's not nerve racking at all. [insert excited sarcasm]
Anyhoo....we're trying to keep folks updated by email, too, so if you didn't just get an email from me, let me know and I'll add you to the list.
Sunday, August 9, 2009
A Change of Hotel Plans
So, we had it all worked out to go pick up Addison...perfect flight, perfect (free) hotel suite at the Sheraton, etc. but the CHI people were giving us a really hard time about staying at the Sheraton. First telling us that we would have to provide our own transportation to and from HOH (so what) and then telling us that we can't have Addison with us at all if we stay at the Sheraton...and that we have to pay silly crib, nanny, food, etc. fees to the HOH while we're there, b/c we are "unwiling to pick up our child when we come."
Needless to say, I've spent the whole weekend boiling, b/c I got the bullying email on Friday after work saying that we couldn't have Addison AT ALL, even after our embassy/exit interview when they have no rights to our child whatsoever, because "we were choosing not to pick him up like all the other parents." The language, threats, punitive fees, etc. has had me pissed for the past 36 hours.
Well, after asking several people's opinions and cooling off a bit...lo and behold, we just booked a reservation at Ethiopia Guest House - a place that CHI approves of, hence we get to take our child and not have to pay them and fight with them. They win. Now, instead of the free accommodations, we are shelling out quite a chunk of money to stay at a place where we "get" to share a bathroom with another family. Oh, the joys. But, hey, if that's what they insist on, then so be it. Since our son has been held prisoner for long enough, we might as well do whatever we can to make sure these people have no reason to end up denying us the rights to get him at the final hour.
We still have our Sheraton reservation - and wil probably keep it. But now that we're playing by their new rules, we get to do with Addison whatever we want in-country...well, except sleep and be where we want with our own child that legally became ours on August 5th, that is.
Needless to say, I've spent the whole weekend boiling, b/c I got the bullying email on Friday after work saying that we couldn't have Addison AT ALL, even after our embassy/exit interview when they have no rights to our child whatsoever, because "we were choosing not to pick him up like all the other parents." The language, threats, punitive fees, etc. has had me pissed for the past 36 hours.
Well, after asking several people's opinions and cooling off a bit...lo and behold, we just booked a reservation at Ethiopia Guest House - a place that CHI approves of, hence we get to take our child and not have to pay them and fight with them. They win. Now, instead of the free accommodations, we are shelling out quite a chunk of money to stay at a place where we "get" to share a bathroom with another family. Oh, the joys. But, hey, if that's what they insist on, then so be it. Since our son has been held prisoner for long enough, we might as well do whatever we can to make sure these people have no reason to end up denying us the rights to get him at the final hour.
We still have our Sheraton reservation - and wil probably keep it. But now that we're playing by their new rules, we get to do with Addison whatever we want in-country...well, except sleep and be where we want with our own child that legally became ours on August 5th, that is.
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
FINALLY!!! HE'S OURS!
August 5th, 2009, little Eyob X from Addis Ababa, Ethiopia, became our little Addison Miles Tyree-Rodriguez! Woo hoo!!
[Insert so many f- bombs and other explicatives here!]
[Insert so many f- bombs and other explicatives here!]
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Cheesy Midnight Poetry
‘Twas the night before court
And all through the house,
Not a creature was stirring,
Not even a mouse.
Ella’s tucked in,
So are Radames and I.
We all just lay thinking
About our new little guy.
Will he or won’t he,
Get to be ours?
Soon we will know,
It’s just a matter of hours.
We want him so bad,
And this time it feels right.
Just one more set of dreams,
Just one more long night.
The silence is thick,
As we wonder and guess,
Hoping the judge in Ethiopia
Soon would say yes.
She’ll bang her gavel
And say, “It was destined to be!”
Or maybe she won’t.
We’ll just have to see.
We’ve all come so far,
Just a little bit more….
Please just let us all wake up
And be a family of four.
And all through the house,
Not a creature was stirring,
Not even a mouse.
Ella’s tucked in,
So are Radames and I.
We all just lay thinking
About our new little guy.
Will he or won’t he,
Get to be ours?
Soon we will know,
It’s just a matter of hours.
We want him so bad,
And this time it feels right.
Just one more set of dreams,
Just one more long night.
The silence is thick,
As we wonder and guess,
Hoping the judge in Ethiopia
Soon would say yes.
She’ll bang her gavel
And say, “It was destined to be!”
Or maybe she won’t.
We’ll just have to see.
We’ve all come so far,
Just a little bit more….
Please just let us all wake up
And be a family of four.
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Could Someone PLEASE tell Ella...
...to stop talking into my belly button and saying, "Addison, it's time for you to come out, Buddy!!!???" "You'll be here soon, Addison...", she likes to say as she pats my stomach and sides and backside! Today she was totally cracking me up as she kept tapping on my belly and said, "It's okay, Addison, we're gonna get you outta there soon....it's okay, baby" in the sweetest little sing-song voice ever. :)
I've told her 1,000 times that he's not coming out of my belly, but I think her 5-year-old brain and my not-so-flat stomach beg to differ.
I've told her 1,000 times that he's not coming out of my belly, but I think her 5-year-old brain and my not-so-flat stomach beg to differ.
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